Passover is my absolute favorite Jewish holiday.
The seder is one of the most important Jewish rituals, and yet it all takes place entirely in the home. It's something we get to shape and make our own, year after year. We set our tables with treasured objects—seder plates and matzo covers, plus wine glasses, dipping bowls, and our fanciest tablecloths—and then add in all sorts of symbolic foods. It's the most beautiful Jewish dinner party, complete with storytelling, singing, and (after a bit of a wait) lots of food.
I'm especially excited this year because it will be my younger daughter Sadie's first seder. Last night I showed my older daughter Edith a video from her first seder in 2022. We were singing “Dayenu,” and she erupted with joy, clapping and burbling along. When we stopped singing, she stopped. When we picked up another verse, she became animated once again. I remember feeling like something truly special was happening.
Playing the video four years later and watching her watch herself, I realized how strongly these rituals tie us to our Jewish identity. She has been singing Pharoah, Pharoah (it’s to the tune of Louie, Louie and I have absolutely no notes) all week in pre-school. And tomorrow she’ll get to welcome her little sister into a new tradition.
As anyone who’s attended a seder with kids knows, it’s a delicate dance; equal parts joyful and chaotic. No one understands this better than Ariel Stein, aka @ariel.loves, founder of @JewishFamilyMagic. Last year she offered GOLDA her tips and tricks to keep the kids entertained and engaged during the seder, and they were so good I’m sharing them again today.
Kid-Friendly Seating
Set up a separate kids’ table to help them feel more comfortable. Include small plates and cups for them and have some toys and books out on the table.
Give the kids their own "mini" seder plate with some of the traditional items (like a slice of matzo, a small piece of bitter herb, etc.) so they feel included in the ritual.
If you have a dedicated play area, set it up with toys, books, or activities to keep them engaged while the adults can focus on the seder. If space is tight, clear a small area with soft items like cushions or blankets.
Be Mindful of Time
The seder can be long, especially with young kids, so consider doing a "shortened" version of the seder. This could mean cutting down on some of the readings or songs but still keeping the key moments intact.
Plan to start your seder a little earlier than usual if possible to avoid toddlers getting too tired or cranky.
Focus on the most important moments in the seder. For example, the blessings over the wine, the washing of hands, and the telling of the story don't need to be super long. Engage the toddlers in shorter bursts of attention.
Make the Seder Interactive
Have kids take turns asking the Four Questions, or assign them to help with symbolic foods (e.g., dipping parsley into saltwater). You can also have them sing or help with the rituals.
Toddlers may not sit still for the entire Haggadah, but you can keep them engaged with a simple retelling of the Exodus story using a children's Haggadah (check out this one from PJ Library), puppets, or picture books.
Incorporate a couple of familiar songs (like "Dayenu" or "Chad Gadya") that you can sing together with the toddlers. You can even get a little dance party going to keep the energy light and fun.
Hide some small items related to Passover around the room (like plastic frogs for the plagues) and let the kids go on a little scavenger hunt.
If one of the toddlers knows a short song or prayer (like "Ma Nishtanah"), let them take the lead. You might also let them help find the Afikoman, which will give them something to look forward to during the seder.
Meal Prep Goes a Long Way!
Have snacks like fruit, matzo crackers, or something simple available at the table, so the kids don't get too fidgety if they're hungry before the meal starts.
With a larger group, it can be easier to serve the meal buffet-style or family-style. This way, guests can help themselves, and you won't be trying to pass dishes around a crowded table.
To avoid the chaos of serving everyone at once, pre-plate the main meal or have portions ready for people to grab. This helps streamline the meal service.
If you're concerned about picky eaters, consider setting aside a "kids' plate" with some familiar foods (like chicken or potatoes) that might be more appealing to them.
Keep the Seder Relaxed
Don't worry about perfection. Things may get a little chaotic with a large group, and that's okay! The focus is on coming together as a community and having an enjoyable experience. Embrace the energy, even if it gets a little messy at times.
Thank you to Ariel for sharing these smart and sweet tips (and those wonderful photos). You can follow her at @ariel.loves and @jewishfamilymagic. As reader Lewis Stone pointed out, we need to get her and Rabbi Arielle Stein together for the ultimate GOLDA interview.
A few more ideas for you as you prep for Passover:
Make these Passover Chocolate Chip Cookies from Nosh with Micah.
Listen to this catchy kids Passover song from Rebecca Schoffer.
Order Jenna Weissman Joselit’s brilliant new book about Mordechai Kaplan from the Yale Jewish Lives series.
Shop these adorable and high-quality Passover paper goods from NESSI before the brand officially launches. They are offering NYC pickup or Manhattan delivery today and tomorrow; message @shop_nessi to get yours.
Sign up for a special evening with me and Jewish Insider’s Gabby Deutch at the Edlavitch DCJCC on April 14 in Washington, D.C.
Register for the second Unpacking the Book conversation at The Jewish Museum with The Jewish Book Council on April 16. I’ll be interviewing authors Daniela Gerson and Nicholas Lemann about themes of exile, wandering, and return in their new books.
GOLDA will be logging off for Passover break. We’ll be back in your inboxes after the holiday with some exciting updates!
Stay GOLDA,
Stephanie